Peru was a beautiful setting for this week’s fantasy suite episode of “The Bachelor.” But really? Huts out in the middle of the desert is Arie Luyendyk Jr.’s idea of a romantic first night together?
The first date of the week was with Kendall. We all knew that Kendall wasn’t long for the show, and when her part of the date and date night were over before we could even shake our heads at her obliviousness and check our Twitter feeds we knew she was gone.
For their date, however, the two of them went out to the desert where they rode dune buggies while choking on the sand being blown into their faces. Romantic.
The preamble to going into the fantasy suite went something like: “I’m in love with you, Arie, but I don’t just want to be a novelty like I have been to so many other men,” and “I love you too, let’s go.” The next morning Arie asked Kendall how she is feeling emotionally and physically. There really wasn’t an answer and the scene cut.
Then it was time for Lauren’s date. This woman is a cold corpse because in the 10 weeks we have known her, she has had no blood flowing anywhere or in any situation.
I’m not saying she has to be smiley all the time, or even tell a joke or anything — let’s just see if there is a personality in there somewhere. Because so far the only glimpse of true emotion we have seen is that one time is Paris when she got a bit ticked off.
They take a plane ride to look at the Nazca lines and Arie said he was falling for this “amazing” woman.
They headed to the evening portion of their date. Arie tried to comfort Lauren by telling her that this process would actually make their relationship stronger because he would have “exhausted these other relationships,” so he would feel more confident about being with her.
That was the part where I just about threw up. So their great love story they will one day tell their mom’s, friends and children is how Arie went for a spin with every other woman, wore them out, and still ended up with Lauren as the prize winner. Lovely!
They exchange “I love you’s” and head into the fantasy suite.
Then it was time for the third and last date of the week, Becca K. There was nothing really interesting about this date until afterwards when Becca’s ex-boyfriend showed up in Peru at her door to propose marriage to her.
After a night in a hut in the desert of Peru, they headed back to their resort to prepare for the rose ceremony when a man in a tan suit showed up at Becca’s door to ask for her hand.
The man was Ross, Becca’s ex-boyfriend. They dated for seven years but he couldn’t get up the nerve or commit to marriage in that time. But as soon as he heard there was a camera, travel, and a scandal at play … He went for it.
He talked about how he just happened to find out Becca was on the show and he didn’t know it ended with a proposal. He started asking around and just happened to find out Becca was in Peru and managed to find her.
With all due respect, Becca handled the whole situation well. Aside from a slew of cuss words that I can’t really blame her for, she showed grace and poise in a awful situation. Becca sat down with him that he couldn’t do this, couldn’t be the guy in the Hallmark movie, and couldn’t assume that if he bought a plane ticket and a bouquet of flowers that she owed him anything. Becca told him to go away.
Right after Ross left, Becca went straight to Arie. He gave a speech about how he didn’t know if she still had feeling for Ross or if this would just complicate everything between the two of them. This, over the woman that just emphatically sent her ex away and went running immediately to him.
It was time for the rose ceremony, where Arie showed a little mercy toward Kendall. He took her aside, telling her that the feelings were just not there, and let her get into a vehicle with her dignity.
The episode ended with Becca, Lauren and Arie looking off into the distance.
Next week, Arie will take Lauren and Becca home with him. We will see Arie express all of the emotions he can possibly come up with and say the same five sentences over and over again before he chose spunky Becca who had the same amount of vocabulary as him and who Arie keeps talking about a future with.
Dollars to donuts though, it will never last.
Savannah Palmer for SUU News
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